Blonde Lesbian
by Dashed
Summary: Isane is a lesbain...so why does she keep sleeping with men?


Disclaimer: I do not own Bleach

A/N: this was a random idea that I thought was funny. Tell me if I should put the rating up though I don't think it needs it. Oh R/R!

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Isane is a lesbian she has known this since the first day she died. She had woken up in a house in the fifty first district, which happened to be Soul Society's red-light district, surrounded by half naked women fawning over her and thought 'I like this, I really, really like this.'

She had stayed in that place for three more years as an errand girl before the lure of Rukongai became to much and she joined becoming a first year student. She had spent five years there and three crushes (all girls) before being offered the spot as Unohana's which she happily excepted because she loved healing and one of her crushes was Unohana herself.

So if she knew and had known for a long time that she was a lesbian why then had the only people she slept with been men?

The first time was easy to excuse. It was graduation and everyone had drank more sake than they should have. She was on her way back from the bathroom when she stumbled because her double vision had led her to believe there were two steps instead of one and fell right into Renji Abara's lap.

He squealed like a little girl.

She was in the middle of apologising when he kissed her. It was a drunken sloppy kiss but nice all the same. No one was more surprised than herself when she ended up in a dark alley Gi down round her ankles as Renji thrust against her. It...happened your not sure if it was good or bad because not only was it your first time but you were really obsessed with his lack of breasts.

That's really what you remember most fiddling with his nipples and thinking 'were are they?' hoping against hope he was somehow tricking you and they would grow any second. In your defence you were drunk and lets not forget when your sober your gay.

In reality however by the time he gave a final thrust and howled, you weren't sure if it was your doing or not but you somehow doubt it, he still had a flat chest though his nipples might have been a bit raw.

That was fine you harbour no ill feelings towards Renji or the sex you had. You definitely knew you were a lesbian now so it wasn't a totally wasted evening.

The second time however was not your fault.

It was against your will almost, you wouldn't say rape because that's too strong a word and you didn't say no and he didn't actually hurt you which was surprising because Zaraki Kenpachi wasn't known for being gentle.

You were at a bar (again) but it was in the seventy ninth district this time in the middle of the night. You were only there because Unohana came to you earlier that night in a white flowing nightdress with a low cut neck line and asked you to do her a favour, you agreed before knowing what it was because she looked at you through half closed eyes and looked as cute that you couldn't say no, not that you could any other time but she made it especially hard that night.

Zaraki was slumped over the bar already very drunk when you were passing him just coming from healing Kenji Unohana's brother-in-law who had been on the losing end of a bar brawl and didn't want his wife to know. He was minus his Vice Captain and it was odd not to see the girl on his shoulder like an over grown parrot. He slapped his sake down and grabbed the nearest female to him (you) and before you knew it (again!) you were in a dingy room on your back laying on a mattress that was too thin your legs spread as Zaraki lubed his sex and was on top of you grunting like a bull.

And really by that stage you weren't going to say 'excuse me Captain Kenpachi but could you stop that now? I'm really interested in girls' you wanted to wake up in the morning _thankyouverymuch_.

It was over very quickly which surprised you because you thought the Captain would have more stamina but you were glad all the same. He pulled out and flopped beside you arm covering his face, it was probably the most calm you have ever seen him. He should have sex a lot more if it keeps him that calm, maybe as a forth division Vice Captain you could medically prescribe it?

You felt a little awkward as the space between you felt uncrossable. You got up to leave when a rough voice said 'and were do you think your going?' you turned back half fearful that you offended him by leaving and half that he was going to start up again. To your immense relief there was no tenting in the sheets and Zaraki was only looking at you with one calm eye his arm only raised enough to see you properly. He stretched his arm out and you stopped yourself from flinching very surprisingly, he then did something that to this day surprises you to no end.

He cuddled.

He pulled you to his broad (flat) chest and you spent the night onto of the eleventh division Captain listening to his steady heart beat. It was the most enjoyable time you've had in ages. In the morning he was as nice or as nice as Zaraki Kenpachi can be and when you got back there were flowers on your desk. The two of you never spoke of it again and he didn't treat you any different outwardly but when he was bellowing at you in a full rage you were never quite as afraid because you remembered him holding you very tightly that night like a big silver haired bear.

You discovered you really liked cuddling and that Captain Kenpachi was really good at it.

The third time however was completely your fault you can admit that.

You were enjoying a rare day off and having sworn of all alcohol and bars you were taking a stroll in the garden to be on the safe side. Instead you stumbled onto a crying Kuchiki Byakuya. Turned out it was the four year anniversary of his wife's death. Immediately you went to him to comfort him. he turned away ashamed but you dragged him to your chest and held him letting him cry and pretending not to hear the words of love and hopelessness he sobbed.

Afterwards you raised his tear stained face and with your thumbs gently wiped away his tears. You released at that moment how very much he resembled a girl. His long flowing hair, slim figure and hips with plump lips. You kissed his forehead but no further as you didn't to take advantage of the obviously upset man before you.

He didn't have the same problem.

He kissed you with a hunger that you knew was reserved for his wife and you let him because you thought it would be to cruel to reject him when he was in such a pathetic state. He turned you around on your hands and knees letting you kneel on his Captains robe while he undressed you both. He lent over you and played with your breasts in a way no one else had taken the time to. He kissed the back of your neck and caressed you all over. If only he was a girl.

You almost forgot that he wasn't as there was no stubble and his skin was baby smooth. The thing that reminded you he wasn't was what was between his girlish hips was most definitely male. You gasped and arched you back as he took you from behind, there wasn't the slight burning or pain that you experienced previously nothing but smooth friction that drove you both crazy.

When it ended he collapsed on your back and you were too weak to support both of your weights after what had just occurred and fell on your face. You both lay there trying to regain your breath back, he recovered first naturally, you would expect nothing less from a Captain. He got up and started to get dressed you didn't mind until you looked directly at him. He was flushed and looking as if he was ashamed of what had occurred. You reached out to him but he pulled away.

"I shouldn't have don't that to her"

You understood of course but you weren't going to let him get away from you that easily. Remembering how much you enjoyed cuddling with Captain Kenpachi you pulled him back down and settled his head on your chest, it was easy to ignore his feeble protests as it was obvious he wanted to be held but was just to proud.

You stayed like that until night came and it was to cold to continue. Silently you both got dressed and as you turned to exit the garden he grabbed your hand and bowing kissed it you could hear the unvoiced thank you so you smiled and left.

Nothing changed between the two of you. You never really saw Byakuya at the Centre and when you did see him there was no reason to talk so that day remained a nice unspoken memory that in your more optimistic moods like to think was happily share by both of you.

Isane shut her journal reflectively. It was nice to get all your thoughts onto paper, it made you more organised she always thought. Maybe she should just give in and become streight its seems as if the universe prefers her that way.

"Isane, what happened to your hand?"

The soft soothing voice belonged to her Captain. She almost forgot what was spoken until long graceful hands picked up her badly bandaged left hand. She had injured it in training distracted as she was by her thoughts, which was why she felt it better to write them down before getting treated as to prevent further lapse in concentration.

Her recent musing had been brought about by two eleven squad idiots. The bald one was telling his friend a joke "did you hear about the blond lesbian?" he waited her a replay but when none was forth coming he continued anyway "she kept sleeping with men!" he gawfed and laughed like it was the funniest thing he had ever heard. She had over heard and silently been angry because it was harder than you would think to sleep with women! They as men should know that! which had brought up all her past encounters...maybe she was a blonde lesbian in spirit if not hair colour.

"An excitant"

"Come to the back and I'll bandage it for you," her glorious Captain turned and walked away expecting no protest "you really shouldn't let the first years practice on you."

She flushed in shame as it wasn't a first year that had tied the bandage badly but herself. She followed the Captain to the end cubical all the others were deserted but Unohana like this one because it had the best view of the Rukongai and was private. She hopped on the desk as Unohana rummaged through the boxes to find a bandage her back to her.

"Here now, give me you hand"

She extended her hand and beautiful hands worked smoothly to untie the bandage. Her breath hitched as Unohana raised the injured hand to blow softly on it lips puckered and full. She loved this woman. The bandage was fitted quickly and properly with the expert skill that one would expect of a fourth division Captain. She was almost disappointed until she was drawn gently forward in a hug.

"Try and be more careful, ok?"

She was tall enough sitting that her head was at the Captains chest height so when she was drawn forward her head was squished between two wonderful pillows. Her thoughts earlier coupled with her intense longing to feel another's breasts might explain why now she was nuzzling her commanding officers chest. While it might explain it there was no way it stopped her from being embarrassed when she finally realised what she had done.

She pulled back with enough force that she might have had whip lash, instead of the angry older woman she had imagined Unohana was smiling at her and with one hand drew the curtains before leaning down to kiss her.

YAY she was getting kissed by a woman! And not just any woman but the woman she had been in love with since her first year here! All the pent up frustration exploded as she pushed the Captain against the wall and ripped open her shirt to see real honest to goodness girly breasts.

She was just so happy!

Unohana might have been a little startled by her Vice Captains forwardness but was calmed as the once hungry fevered kisses gentled and hand caressed her. She spent the next few hours moaning and pleading for the young girl to stop as the stamina of youth seemed to out do her.

Isane lay on her Captain with a grin that couldn't be described as anything other than shit-eating on her face. The Captain was sound asleep beneath her and it took all herself control not to wake the woman up and start again. She had discovered that despite the universes wish she really was a lesbian. A big one at that.

She let her eyes flutter closed her hand came to sleepily cup the older woman's far breast reluctant to let go encase it might have been a dream.

_Blonde indeed _she snorted.

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A/N yes I do think Kenpachi is a cuddler! ;)


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